Telly Savalas & Harvey Korman
👨🦲🚬 « Merging » 👨🦲
Carol Burnett Show
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Funny skit that has Telly Savalas and Harvey Korman discussing a failed business merger as if it were a love affair.
Taken from The Carol Burnett Show
Season 8 - Episode 5, which aired on October 12, 1974
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Last few seconds:
"Arnold"
"Arnold"
" Paul"
and they start " cracking up"!
Watch Paul's face as he turns to leave ! Great stuff !
and they start " cracking up"!
Watch Paul's face as he turns to leave ! Great stuff !
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👨🦲🚬 👨🦲🚬 👨🦲🚬👨🦲🚬 👨🦲🚬 👨🦲🚬 👨🦲🚬
🤭So much to be said about pushing the proverbial envelope!
Ernie Anderson the voice of Simpkins at the end.
😂 😂 🤭 😂 😂 🤭
Two and a Half Men
Two and a Half Men
Berta & Telly Savalas
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Hello Reynolds sorry to keep you waiting but I've been up to my ears it's all right bring Mr. Marsham Man head not too sweet and straight up thank you thank
you can't imagine all the details you have to take care of when you're merging new furniture new stationary I mean it's practically like a whole new life listen Reynolds are you sure we're doing the right thing my moving into your offices.
Look Mara I've done a lot of thinking and well I'm going to be blunt the merger is off.
Just like that please Marsh let's not have a scene
Yeah but I told everybody were merging my vice president my secretary the washroom attendant I mean how do you expect me to face people well tell them it was your decision tell them tell them you turn me down they don't have to know the truth but I'll know the truth what do I say to myself during those still small hours of the night when I'm all alone that my company wasn't good enough to merge it's not that way Marsh it's just that well we're not right for each other but it seems so right Consolidated soup and Amalgamated nuts it just was so right what it did on paper on paper it's an ideal merger but there are other things besides paper Reynolds please I know we can make a go of it you're making it very difficult I'm making it difficult please Marsh people are beginning to stare sorry tell me the truth Reynolds there's another company isn't there I knew it it's Simkins isn't it how did you know you think I'm blind don't you think I noticed his annual report lying innocently on your desk
I heard the rumors about a certain nuts Tycoon seen lunching with the bolts executive as far as those weekend yacht trips together they're common knowledge you're making it sound so [Laughter] cheap all right Reynolds what does General Boltz have that I don't have nothing you've got a perfect comp no no come on tell me I can take the truth what is it what's wrong is it my price earning ratio no it's nothing like that look Marsh I know how you feel but you get over it there'll be another company but it won't be the [Music] [Laughter] same what's the matter now listen I don't hear anything I'd so like you the song they were playing the night you proposed our merger don't you remember we're up in the Rainbow Room City spread out before us like a carpet of Lights through your cigar smoke you looked me straight in the eye and said let's merge I said yes evidently I said it too quickly you must have thought I was easy.
Never… never.
Oh come on don't fool me I've heard the talk Marsh is going bankrupt he's an easy merant I never thought of you that way Marsh no no I've always I've always respected your company what did Hayworth tell you about my company nothing nothing I' never discuss your company with Hayworth why what was there to tell nothing oh I know this is rough on you yeah you know but it hasn't been easy for me sneaking around to these secret meeting places using assume names you're the one that didn't want the justice department to know I know I know look can we let just buy guns we buy guns all right so we don't merge we can still do business together can't we what kind of a company do you think I want well I didn't mean it that way no of course you didn't look we did make some deals yes but only because you promised we'd merge if I don't it was going to turn out this way I would have never let you into my corporate bonds you wanted that as much as I.
Did I know but I gave you something I never gave anyone else my debentures I know and I and I respect you for it well then why why
please Marsh let's not spoil it me I'm not spoiling it you are well let me tell you something I'll tell you the truth I never really cared for your company you're not the only Pebble on the big board tell you something else all the while we were discussing merger I was making deals with other companies please Marsh don't I spoke to a lot of companies if and W A and C Jr. of r& J and r no yes J&R I made lots of deals with him cheap TDY little deals and we know you know what I let him.
Do what I let him handle my stock options stop it Marsh I know you're not like that do you really
yes yes yes so please don't don't cheapen what we had cuz I don't want it to end this way I want to remember the way it really was I want to remember the good times all right all right you want me to have my chauffer drive you home no I'd rather be alone well goodbye.
Paul goodbye Arnold.
Hello Simpkins I waited 10 minutes I'm sorry it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be what wasn't well I told you about it last night how I'd get rid of mar so I could be free to talk to you well I'm free I'm free well look Reynolds I've given it a lot of thought the merger is off.
Just like that.
you can't imagine all the details you have to take care of when you're merging new furniture new stationary I mean it's practically like a whole new life listen Reynolds are you sure we're doing the right thing my moving into your offices.
Look Mara I've done a lot of thinking and well I'm going to be blunt the merger is off.
Just like that please Marsh let's not have a scene
Yeah but I told everybody were merging my vice president my secretary the washroom attendant I mean how do you expect me to face people well tell them it was your decision tell them tell them you turn me down they don't have to know the truth but I'll know the truth what do I say to myself during those still small hours of the night when I'm all alone that my company wasn't good enough to merge it's not that way Marsh it's just that well we're not right for each other but it seems so right Consolidated soup and Amalgamated nuts it just was so right what it did on paper on paper it's an ideal merger but there are other things besides paper Reynolds please I know we can make a go of it you're making it very difficult I'm making it difficult please Marsh people are beginning to stare sorry tell me the truth Reynolds there's another company isn't there I knew it it's Simkins isn't it how did you know you think I'm blind don't you think I noticed his annual report lying innocently on your desk
I heard the rumors about a certain nuts Tycoon seen lunching with the bolts executive as far as those weekend yacht trips together they're common knowledge you're making it sound so [Laughter] cheap all right Reynolds what does General Boltz have that I don't have nothing you've got a perfect comp no no come on tell me I can take the truth what is it what's wrong is it my price earning ratio no it's nothing like that look Marsh I know how you feel but you get over it there'll be another company but it won't be the [Music] [Laughter] same what's the matter now listen I don't hear anything I'd so like you the song they were playing the night you proposed our merger don't you remember we're up in the Rainbow Room City spread out before us like a carpet of Lights through your cigar smoke you looked me straight in the eye and said let's merge I said yes evidently I said it too quickly you must have thought I was easy.
Never… never.
Oh come on don't fool me I've heard the talk Marsh is going bankrupt he's an easy merant I never thought of you that way Marsh no no I've always I've always respected your company what did Hayworth tell you about my company nothing nothing I' never discuss your company with Hayworth why what was there to tell nothing oh I know this is rough on you yeah you know but it hasn't been easy for me sneaking around to these secret meeting places using assume names you're the one that didn't want the justice department to know I know I know look can we let just buy guns we buy guns all right so we don't merge we can still do business together can't we what kind of a company do you think I want well I didn't mean it that way no of course you didn't look we did make some deals yes but only because you promised we'd merge if I don't it was going to turn out this way I would have never let you into my corporate bonds you wanted that as much as I.
Did I know but I gave you something I never gave anyone else my debentures I know and I and I respect you for it well then why why
please Marsh let's not spoil it me I'm not spoiling it you are well let me tell you something I'll tell you the truth I never really cared for your company you're not the only Pebble on the big board tell you something else all the while we were discussing merger I was making deals with other companies please Marsh don't I spoke to a lot of companies if and W A and C Jr. of r& J and r no yes J&R I made lots of deals with him cheap TDY little deals and we know you know what I let him.
Do what I let him handle my stock options stop it Marsh I know you're not like that do you really
yes yes yes so please don't don't cheapen what we had cuz I don't want it to end this way I want to remember the way it really was I want to remember the good times all right all right you want me to have my chauffer drive you home no I'd rather be alone well goodbye.
Paul goodbye Arnold.
Hello Simpkins I waited 10 minutes I'm sorry it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be what wasn't well I told you about it last night how I'd get rid of mar so I could be free to talk to you well I'm free I'm free well look Reynolds I've given it a lot of thought the merger is off.
Just like that.
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