Dorothy Parker (née Rothschild; August 22, 1893 – June 7, 1967) was an American poet, writer, critic, and satirist based in New York; she was best known for her wit, wisecracks, and eye for 20th-century urban foibles.
From a conflicted and unhappy childhood, Parker rose to acclaim, both for her literary works published in magazines, such as The New Yorker, and as a founding member of the Algonquin Round Table.
Following the breakup of the circle, Parker traveled to Hollywood to pursue screenwriting. Her successes there, including two Academy Award nominations, were curtailed when her involvement in left-wing politics resulted in her being placed on the Hollywood blacklist.
Dismissive of her own talents, she deplored her reputation as a
"wisecracker." Nevertheless, both her literary output and reputation for
sharp wit have endured. Some of her works have been set to music;
adaptations notably include the operatic song cycle Hate Songs by composer Marcus Paus.
Here are some pearls Dorothy Parker said or may have said during her life-time:
“If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.”
“Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.”
“Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.”
“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”
“I had been fed, in my youth, a lot of old wives' tales about the way men would instantly forsake a beautiful woman to flock around a brilliant one. It is but fair to say that, after getting out in the world, I had never seen this happen."
“There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words."
“If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.”
“I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.”
1. I don’t care what is written about me so long as it isn’t true.
2. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
3. You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
4.
I’m never going to accomplish anything; that’s perfectly clear to me.
I’m never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the
roster of Those Who Do Things. I don’t do anything. Not one single
thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don’t even do that any more.
5. I
might repeat to myself slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations
beautiful from minds profound — if I can remember any of the damn
things.
6. Four be the things I’d have been better without: Love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.
7. I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.
8. Take care of luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.
9. Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
10. The two most beautiful words in the English language are ‘cheque enclosed.’
11. The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
12. It serves me right for keeping all my eggs in one bastard. (Said when leaving hospital after an abortion).
13. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
14.
I like to have a martini,
I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I’m under the table,
after four I’m under my host.
15. Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
16. I’ve never been a millionaire but I just know I’d be darling at it.
17. If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
18. When asked to use the word horticulture during a game of Can-You-Give-Me-A-Sentence, Parker replied: You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
19. Of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged, Parker said: “This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.”
20.
I’ve been too fucking busy – or vice versa. (in response to a letter
from her editor asking for more stories during her honeymoon).
20.
I’ve been too fucking busy – or vice versa. (in response to a letter
from her editor asking for more stories during her honeymoon).
The Algonquin's Round Table...
Dorothy Parker & Alan Campbell.
Dottie & Alan
Lillian Hellman & Dorothy Parker.
Dorothy
Parker was an American poet, writer, critic, and satirist based in New
York; she was best known for her wit, wisecracks, and eye for
20th-century urban foibles. Wikipedia
Born: August 22, 1893, Long Branch, NJ
Died: June 7, 1967, Manhattan, New York, NY
Spouse: Alan Campbell (m. 1950–1963), Alan Campbell (m. 1933–1947), Edwin Pond Parker II (m. 1917–1928)
Parents: Jacob Henry Rothschild, Eliza Annie Rothschild
Siblings: Helen Rothschild
Dorothy Parker’s stunning wit and tragic life
On the 50th anniversary of her death, Hephzibah Anderson looks beyond
Dorothy Parker’s wisecracks to find another side of the legendary wit.
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